In previous posts, we have looked at gratitude, happiness and serving others and how your self-talk can guide you in these areas. Also, we have looked at an essential element of your mindset for successful networking. You must focus on what you can control, which is you and your thoughts. Do not focus on what you cannot control, which is others.
Part of the control issue is that when we first network with someone there can be a tendency to have a “fixer upper attitude” or “I am here to help.” While both of these may sound good, they actually can work against you and your goal of building deeper relationships through networking.
They imply to the person on the receiving end of your communication that somehow you are superior and that they are fortunate that you with your knowledge and insights without knowing anything about them can solve their problem. In your self-talk with others remember that you are not there to fix anyone. You are in the conversation to discover how to support someone. There is in the mind of the person receiving the communication a big difference between help and support.
In business coaching in The Woodlands and business coaching in Houston the key to good coaching, in my opinion, is to get to know the other person and then figure out the best way to support them for who they are. The goal isn’t control so much as to co-create, along with the client, pathways to more successful performance.
In the last post, we talked about focusing on what you can control, your thoughts, words and self-talk. These will support you in your networking and building deeper relationships.
In this post, I will share some more keys that have helped me in my self-talk and to be a better connector, listener and networker. First, you just have to accept some things as they are. Some things will always remain a mystery. Don’t question or grill another person about something that could be uncomfortable. This is not the time or the place. To build a deeper networking relationship, accept it and move on. Remember, your attitude is a muscle. Exercise it wisely.
In terms of having a better attitude and something you can control make sure that you choose your friends wisely. I have seen relationships developing at networking events and then someone brings their friend over. Depending on the friend it can elevate or eliminate a relationship.
Choosing your friends wisely is crucial. If your friends are bringing your turmoil it is hard for your self-talk, which is what you will project on others in networking to be positive. Get your head quiet. It is the only way to see your blessings and to be grateful.
To build deeper relationships in networking it is important that your self-talk puts you in a good place. If your close friends are not in a good place and are bringing a constant stream of anger and complaining, then it is hard for you to be in a good place. And, if you are not in a good place, this will be brought into your networking relationships.
If you are in a good place you are more likely to listen to others, encourage them and bring an aura of feeling blessed and being happy. All of these are invitations to building better and deeper relationships.
Choose your friends wisely. It will keep your self-talk in a good place and keep your networking working while building deeper relationships.