There is a song by the musical group, Alabama, “I’m in a Hurry.”
All of us appear to be in a hurry. Is that something that benefits us? At times we are in a season of hurriedness. That is understandable. But, if your whole life is that way I suggest that you are missing many things.
The first verse of the song states:
“I’m in a hurry to get things done
Oh I rush and rush until life’s no fun
All I really gotta do is live and die
But I’m in a hurry and don’t know why.”
In today’s world being in a hurry can be equated with being busy. We are busy because we are striving for greater self-esteem, wealth, possessions and property among other things. But, in looking at my own life and those of my personal business coaching clients I see that excessive hurriedness because we are always busy is a distraction. We rush and rush until life’s no fun. And we don’t either recognize or know why our lives are no fun.
Being continually busy never gives me, you, or my clients time to rest and recharge. The brain in order to function at a high level needs lazy time. It needs to take a break. But between texts, emails, phone calls, work and our day to day encounters it’s hard for us and our brains to find the quiet time to recharge. And without quiet time it is more challenging to be happy. I once heard that success is getting what you want. Happiness is wanting what you get.
And, here is the truth. There is no success without happiness. The song goes on with this verse:
“Can’t be late
I leave plenty of time
Shaking hands with the clock
I can’t stop
I’m on a roll and I’m ready to rock”
The key phrases here are “Shaking hands with the clock. I can’t stop.” When we live our lives in the hurry mode, always having to be busy doing something it becomes a race everyday to see what we can accomplish. And, it has been shown that being too busy actually creates other distractions (too much going on at once) which causes us to accomplish less. We accomplish less and that makes us unhappy. And the cycle continues.
We believe in our busyness that we are taking care of what is truly important. But are we? Very often, I see myself and others missing what truly matters. What truly matters is the time we spend on our relationships and how we spend it. When there is always a time limit and a short window with our interactions with others, people don’t feel valued or that you have time for their cares and concerns. That becomes a breeding ground for frustration, anger and distancing.
And when the relational frustration boils over, all the hurriedness that got us to that point is the last behavior pattern we need to continue to get things back on course. At this point, we need to slow down. We need to take time.
Ultimately, without fulfilling relationships we cannot have happiness and we cannot have overall success. What can you do to minimize the chances of this happening? Slow down! Create self-awareness as to how your hurriedness is impacting your relationships and life. The last verse of the song states:
“I hear a voice
That say’s I’m running behind
I better pick up my pace
It’s a race
And there ain’t no room
For someone in second place.”
When you always have to be in first place, be in hurry and be busy, you will always put others in second place. And when others know they are in second place guess what they do to you, if they have the option? They put you in second place. This is not a prescription for good relationships, happiness or success.
In the end a life that is too hurried is a life where we miss what truly matters, other people. And, missing what truly matters is what hurts us the most and will hold us back. Be self-aware. Give yourself a break. Slow down. You must slow down and have a rest in order to speed up. That’s the best way to move quickly and get things done, while taking care of your relationships.